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Trauma

Trauma is not what you think it is. We have been taught that it is something to be fixed, to get rid of, but what if we welcomed it? What if we got to know these parts of ourselves that are in ‘trauma’? And gave them a safe space to land. What if we allowed ourselves to slow down and rest? From this place of rest, this is where we do our work. 

‘Trauma’ is stored in our cells, in our physical landscape, in the holding patterns of our biology. Our trauma memories get stored as frozen and stuck emotion that can be felt as tension in our body. In order to process trauma and to meet these parts of us that have been holding for so long, we need to contact safety, on a cellular level. This is not something that we can reach with the mind, it is not something that we can figure out or even understand. 

We need a whole new way of relating to ourselves, one that is filled with kindness, compassion, time and space. When trauma freezes in our cells, we disconnect from ourselves, we see the parts that hold the trauma as bad, distorted, disfigured, we try everything we can to move away from them. They feel like they are not us, and when we contact them somatically we feel shame and numbness in our bodies. But when we can provide the ground for these parts to be held and witnessed, we realise that these parts are scared and distressed, that they are holding painful experiences for us and are just wanting to be soothed. 

We are learning to unravel in a gentle way. 

We start therapy with the fact that there is nothing wrong with you. Nothing to fix. It is just your body in protection. We need to make space for that protection to be there so we can unravel gently. We need to slow down and come back to safety. Sometimes we don’t even know that we feel unsafe. We have to welcome the protection first. And once we contact safety in our body, the truth reveals itself. We have everything we need inside of us. We just have to slow down and listen.

If you’d like to work with me or learn more about how I work, get in touch with me here.